Four years ago, Michael Phelps said in an interview that he thought Lindsay Lohan was “pretty hot” & he would love to meet her. By “meet”, he meant “plow”.
Apparently, even though Lindsay has recently decided that she is gay, Phelps may finally get his shot at “meeting” her. We have learned from Access Hollywood schmuck tool interviewer Billy Bush that Lindsay is quite interested in “meeting” the Olympic Golden Boy. The always classy Lohan sent Billy Bush a text message earlier in the week that she thinks Phelps “is f***ing amazing, & I want to meet him”. Like, OMG, that would so totally awesome if Lindsay & Phelps hooked up. It would be like totally off the chain.
One piece of advice Michael…DON’T DO IT. It ain’t 2004 anymore buddy. Plenty has happened since you thought Lindsay was “pretty hot”. When I say lots has happened, I mean that Lindsay could have pulled a Wilt Chamberlain-like streak in that time frame. There aren’t enough condoms in the entire Olympic Village for Lindsay Lohan. She is bad news homie & why would you thrown away all the cred you have gained in the past week? America loves you pal! Don’t get with The Lohan!
Cinematically Correct note: Lindsay Lohan’s behavior is reason #37 why I am terrified to ever have a daughter.
19 Comments
August 19, 2008 at 6:07 PM
Amen.
August 19, 2008 at 10:00 PM
ITA. Four years ago Lindsay was starring in Mean Girls, and looked healthy and sexy. Today she’s just a used up druggie who is always flirting with an anorexic look.
I bet he doesn’t find her “pretty hot” anymore.
August 20, 2008 at 2:05 AM
I actually love Lindsay Lohan but this little blog is hilarious. Phelps needs to be paired up with someone who just as talented as he is, or at least half. Maybe Shaun Johnson or something? They could have super olympic gold medalist babies.
August 20, 2008 at 9:47 AM
Aww, thanks for the compliment! I was afraid that the Lohan fans would really rip me for this one.
If Phelps wanted to really make headlines, he would hook up with Alicia Sacramone…if he hasn’t already. From what I understand, the Olympic Village is just one big free for all.
August 20, 2008 at 10:15 AM
Please Phelps — Don’t get involve with Lindsay Lohan.
Don’t degrade yourself to a low-life lesbian druggie. She’ll ’sink’ your successful life.
August 20, 2008 at 10:18 AM
Ugh! The more I hear about Michael Phelps’ tastes the more I think the guy may be a dumb***. Yeah, sure, he’s this super terrific athlete, and it may not be the most patriotic thing to say, but he just reminds me of all those stupid, lanky looking Abercrombie guys hanging out at the mall, hitting on all the 13 year old skanks.
August 20, 2008 at 10:20 AM
Michael, Michael, Michael…
You’ve worked your butt off, and become an Athlete Gawd.
You’re going to get more attention than a hundred dollar bill laying on the sidewalk. You deserve all the attention you get. You’re a tremendous example of what Americans can be, and a wonderful role model for my son.
Sure Lindsey was cute, once. But that blossom has faded, and now she’s just a used up skank, trying desperately to make a come-back. What better way than to attach herself to you like a remora, and steal some of your thunder. Take a pass on this one.
There are tons of fish in the sea, and you’re justthe predator to go find a good one… (I’m hearing the theme from Jaws in the background… Duh-da, Duh-da-duh-da-duh-da…)
Trust me, the disease and the drama you avoid, may be your own…
Atta boy!
August 20, 2008 at 10:21 AM
Don’t do it, Michael. Please. For the sake of human kind.
August 20, 2008 at 10:23 AM
Amen
August 20, 2008 at 10:41 AM
“Sink”…Jaws…fish in the sea…
…at this point, I just want to see how many water references can be made.
August 20, 2008 at 12:04 PM
he better not date that skank, if i was him i’d stay far away from her nasty ass
August 20, 2008 at 12:29 PM
OMG– I hate this Billy Bush — he’s going to ruin Michael Phelps by helping this Bisexual freak to meet with Michael Phelps. well, if Michael decided to meet Lindsay — he’s absolutely a no brainer and is a freak too! I don’t think America will continue to support him if that really happens! On the other hand -I don’t understand why people would think Lindsay is hot? No taste at all. She’s not the kind of girl has the appearance that stands out the crowd if not for her name. You can find 100 Lindsays just by walking on the Street of West Hollywood and Santa Monica. Besides, She has the face of her mom the older she grows, which is bad news in my opinion. She was prettier when she was a teenager. Her mom looks like a freak herself. They both look angry – That’s called Angry, not sexy or edgy-why can’t they fix their eye brows? Their make up artists obviously have bad eyes and bad taste! And they both have bad teeth– Lindsay looks as if she doesn’t brush her teeth often? Her mom too- she has over crowded teeth and doesn’t fix them with all that money she’s got, how come?? They all have bad skin too? Everything you see them on covers or on TV have been airbrushed– can you imagine seeing their real face when they wake up in the morning without make-up?? Michael – please pick a hot super model over lindsay for goodness sake! You’re handsome, powerful just now, young and everything, you should be with someone who at least has a normal IQ and look like super model. Lindsay is way short than you too– don’t look good together seriously. There’re plenty of girls that are hotter than Lindsay Lohan inside America and outside America, come on!! Don’t be blinded by your past illusion about this white trash. Birds with same feather flock together- we don’t want to see you becoming a white trash yourself like many of the Hollywood people whom they think they’re something in their own eyes!
Good Luck Michael Phelps!!
hope we hear good news from him and that he is wise and smart as how he swims!!
August 20, 2008 at 1:33 PM
lol well said my friend
very well said
August 20, 2008 at 2:50 PM
Lohan…wow, that would be a recipe for disaster for Phelps.
August 20, 2008 at 3:43 PM
http://www.asklopan.com/
August 21, 2008 at 1:59 PM
C.C.: About the “water references…” Sorry, I just couldn’t resist…
Next they’ll be trying to crucify his father for refusing to steal any of “Golden Boy’s” thunder. His dad nailed it when he said: “It’s all about Michael right now, and he’s certainly earned it…”
I hope Michael does great! What an inspiration!
RR
August 21, 2008 at 2:05 PM
Oh no, no apologies needed. If there is a fan of cheesy references like that, it’s this site.
January 27, 2009 at 10:20 PM
poor michael phelps
February 2, 2009 at 8:10 PM
OMG!
It seems that the “Golden Boy” can’t resist a good party, and a few “bong sucking” sessions. Oh boy… There goes his contracts…
Man, those morals clauses can be a real bitch!
LOL! What a moron! He had us in the palm of his hand, and then… Up In Smoke!
(Sorry, couldn’t resist the pun…)
Ronin