Slate Says “Save Paul Rudd”? My Man Crush On Him Says Otherwise

Fantana bitch slaps Dan Rather & Walter Kronkite...combined.

This weekend, even though it looks fairly stupid, I’m going to pay some good, hard-earned cashed and see “Dinner For Schmucks”. You may ask why Cinematically Correct, why would you do such a thing? Is it because you love “The Office” and think Steve Carell is a comedic genius? Do you enjoy the awkward absurdity of Zach Galifianakis or Jemaine Clement? Why yes, I do like those things. However, the evil Jay Roach directed this thing and considering everything he touches is complete and utter garbage (well, except “Recount”), it should be the #1 reason to keep me away. After all, I haven’t seen “Date Night” because of my belief that Tina Fey is incredibly unfunny so the Carell factor is right out.

No, my main reason to see this is Paul Rudd. Not only did I see “Role Models” and “I Love You Man” on their opening weekends, I own them. You name a movie he’s in from the last ten years or so and there’s a good chance that I a) love it and b) own it.

See…I have man crush on Paul Rudd. There, I said it. He hasn’t been in a movie in which he didn’t steal a scene in quite some time. My opinion of Rudd is what has me a bit confused after reading this Slate article about him titled “Save Paul Rudd”. The writer, Elbert Ventura, picks apart Rudd’s recent movies and tries to give him backhanded praise by calling the movies “conventional”, a “lazy mess”, or “exhausted retreads”. I completely beg to differ.

In too cool for school fashion (which for me to say is like the pot calling the kettle black), Ventura lavishes praise on “Wet Hot American Summer”. Do I agree with him that Rudd dominates that movie as a full-on sleazeball? Yeah, he does. This is such an easy movie to target as “the one that he was really great” since virtually no one has ever seen it. I think people should see it, but it is way too odd and bizarre to get that far in the mass public. But can a hipster writer for Slate identify it? Well, of course he can silly.

But Ventura makes it seem like he went downhill from there. Was “Anchorman”‘s Brian Fantana much different than the scummy camp counselor in “Wet Hot American Summer”? Not so much. Rudd is able to pull these parts off because he’s good looking enough and just absurd enough for you to not completely hate the character. You have to like them a little bit or else you won’t laugh, you’ll cringe and wince your way through the movie.

Ventura thinks Rudd pretty much quit there. I don’t think so. His gradual downward spiral in “The 40-Year Old Virgin” is one for the books. He starts off as a lovelorn ex-boyfriend, yearning for his lady but by the end of the movie, he’s a train wreck. Not only does he pull that off nicely, he and Seth Rogen participated in one of the greatest ad-libbed moments in movie history. You know it.

In “Knocked Up”, he got to play a married guy that can’t seem to completely grow up. In this, he says and does a few things that aren’t sleazy as much as they are inconsiderate. He’s not playing a bad guy so much as he may just be a funny, charming guy who isn’t the best husband. Not to be too melodramatic, but this is a very “real” role for him. Again, his charm and ability to convey that he’s a good guy get you through it. He also does a killer Robert De Niro impression.

Now, we get to his two starring roles in “Role Models” and “I Love You Man”. He plays completely different in each of them and kills in both. He’s cynical to the Nth degree in “Role Models” and there hasn’t been a role yet that enabled him to show off how dryly hilarious he can be. Honestly? It’s my favorite role he’s had to date. All I’ll say about “I Love You Man” is that if you have seen it, you’ve imitated him saying “slappin’ the bass”. You know you have.

Why all this in response to one silly article I read? Well, because that article, while meant to be complimentary to Paul Rudd, is effectively a slap to the face and/or bass. You like Paul Rudd…but you seem to hate all the movies that he’s in? That doesn’t make much sense to me.

So to sum up…umm…you should like Paul Rudd. So, talk to you later Jobin.

The Cult Of Apple Is In Full Throttle At My House

My next home will be 100% Apple products. Dishwasher, fridge, toothbrush, all of it.

Here are the current Apple products that can be found in my home:

• 80GB iPod
• 8GB iPod Nano
• 2 iPhone 3GSs
• 21.5″ iMac
• Macbook 4
• Apple TV
• Steve Jobs – he lives in my extra bedroom sometimes. He’s creepy.

Yes, I have added Apple TV to the Apple arsenal. Why did I get this device now, with full knowledge that some sort of fancy upgraded version is due out within the year? Well, I’ve crossed my fingers in hopes that I can simply upgrade this device to do whatever the new Apple TV will do. But of course, that’s probably wishful thinking because Apple so does not operate that way.

I snagged this guy for two reasons:

1. My Netflix membership is a waste for me. For about $15 a month, I get Bluray discs sent to me one movie at a time. Since I watch several TV shows and don’t miss a Phillies game, that leaves little time for watching movies at home. This means I hold onto a movie for weeks at a time, thus ripping myself off. Now, if I know I want to rent a movie, I just click on Apple TV and rent it in full HD for $4.

2. Right now, I plug my iPod into my stereo and use it to listen to music. Since the Internet in my house is wireless, I can sync Apple TV up to my iTunes library on my iMac and play music that way. Is that really a big deal? Maybe not to you, but when you have to run half way across the house to change what you are listening to, it would. Now, the iPhone is my remote and if I’m in the laundry room and I want to change music, click, done. No more running through the house!

Essentially, I am fully embracing the technology that is available. Sure, it costs some bucks, is fairly self-indulgent, and very Apple-snob of me, which I realize is kind of uncool now, but I don’t care. They make great stuff…well, maybe not iPhone 4, but you just never mind that!

Sorry, Steve got out of the bedroom and typed that last paragraph.

Mr. Stanley Kubrick Or How I Learned To Stop Worrying & Love The Movies

Nobody better. Ever.

After years of movie worship, I’ve found that I believe more and more that Stanley Kubrick is the greatest film director that has ever lived. Trust me, I’ve read a lot about the guy. Actually, that’s really not that impressive considering he was one of the most private famous people of all time.

Kubrick would have been 82 years old two days ago. It’s probably a date I should save on my iPhone as Kubrick’s movies are as responsible for me leaving the casual movie fan world and becoming a hard core film lover. I mean, only Kubrick could make someone start paying attention to aspect ratio or composition (of which he was a master). His movies made me learn some of these terms, they made me pay attention to more things on that screen other than people saying words. Kubrick made me absorb every frame of every movie that I see. Well, almost. It’s tough to really absorb all of “Clash Of The Titans”.

I learned about Kubrick in a roundabout strange way. In 1985, my mom and I made a trip to our locally owned rental store. Remember those? You know, the ones that had little circular tags hanging under the VHS cases? For some reason, I decided that I wanted to take “2010″ home. I was ten, what did I know?

So I watched Helen Mirren do a crap Russian accent in that movie and wondered, “Why does this seem like I’m missing something here?” After the next trip to the store, I found out that “2010″ was a sequel to “2001″. I guess the VHS box to “2001″ wasn’t appealing enough to me because I didn’t rent it and moved on with my life of GI Joes and comic books.

That very year, I watched “2001″ in school. True story. I grew up in an area with lots of snow and when it was ugly outside, we all went to our school auditorium for lunch and recess. Well, they usually popped movies in and over the span of three or four days, I saw all of “2001″. I was fascinated. What the hell kind of a movie doesn’t have people talking in it like this? Who does this? It was almost 30 years old but nothing like I had ever seen.

Well, that got the ball rolling. Thanks to HBO, I was able to see most of Kubrick’s older movies. Once I got to college, it was over. I made sure that I saw them all. “Barry Lyndon”. “Lolita”. “Paths Of Glory”. And, of course, “A Clockwork Orange”.

Which leads me to perhaps my most controversial opinion on Kubrick: I despise “A Clockwork Orange”. I just don’t get it and I never will. It doesn’t have much of a point to me and the shock value seems to be there only for shock value’s sake. Another odd opinion? I totally dig “Eyes Wide Shut”. I think it’s oddly creepy and a real underrated performance from Tom Cruise. Honestly, tell me one actor that Kubrick didn’t get a great performance out of?

So I feel completely indebted to Stanley Kubrick. That one movie, “2001″, got my movie brain going and I wish he was still alive today. You’d have to think he had at least one more movie in him and who knows, it may have altered film making for this century too.

Why Does Zach Snyder Have A Get Out Of Movie Jail Free Card?

After all the cool news that came out of Comic Con over the weekend, there’s one thing that I just can’t figure out. I get the excitement over the entire cast of The Avengers showing up, how cool it would have been to sit in on The Expendables panel, all that badass Tron stuff, etc. There is one thing that sticks out to me:

Why does everyone worship Zach Snyder? This completely blows my mind. I’ve sat through all of his movies and his “Dawn Of The Dead” remake is easily his best movie, which is not saying much about his body of work. “300″ is an aggressive, painful attack on every sense you possess and “Watchmen” is absolutely terrible. This 90 second trailer for “Sucker Punch” has done little to make me think that Snyder’s changed his tune at all. This looks exactly like every other movie he’s made and either I’m missing the boat here or the Snyder apologists are 100% insane. I mean…this guy sucks, no other way for me to express my opinion about him.

Anybody Up To Watch “Tron” Then Play Some Tank Later Today?

Normally, I don’t get all geeked out over action scenes or fancy special effects. I’m more of a plot or character driven movie fan, which is why I loved “Inception” and despise “Avatar”. One uses effects and action to push a story, the other showed me tall blue cats flying on dinosaurs for an hour. Boooooring.

This latest trailer for “Tron Legacy” may be the rare exception for me. This trailer was shown at the Tron panel at Comicon yesterday and there’s no doubt that the geeks were floored. It just looks mind-blowing.

The Movie Villain Has Become More Fun Than The Hero

The 2012 summer movie season looks like it’s going to be packed full. Sadly, I’ve spent a fair chunk of time looking into the 2012 releases and just these three movies alone make it a huge summer: “The Avengers”, “Men In Black 3″, and the third Christopher Nolan Batman flick. That’s a whole lot of superhero stuff.

Doesn’t it seem like the villains have become the much cooler part of these movies? Don’t you foresee Jemaine Clement as an evil alien in “Men In Black 3″ easily stealing that movie right out from under Will Smith and Tommy Lee Jones? Although, it will be tough to steal “The Avengers” away from that collection of people playing superheroes. Actually, it would be tough to steal any movie away from Robert Downey Jr.

Well, Firstshowing.net has gotten their hands on a casting grid sheet for Nolan’s third Batman and it features The Riddler as the main villain. As rumored, the greatness that is Joseph Gordon-Levitt is the first name listed with the note “interested” written beside it. Um, duh. Get this done people.

Actually, the only person other than JGL I’d like to see as The Riddler is Leo DiCaprio. Of course, if I was going to redo “2001″, I’d cast Leo as Hal. Or a gorilla. Or the bone that the gorilla throws up in the sky then cuts to the space ship orbiting Earth. F it, I’d cast Leo as the Earth.  That’s how kickass Leo is. But I’m off topic, any thoughts on Leo as The Riddler?

Reason #29 Why I Worship Bill Murray: He’s Forthcoming

A guy like Bill Murray doesn’t care about bridges at this point in his career. He’s burning them left and right. What does he care? He’s Peter Venkman, he’s Bob Harris, he’s Phil Connors…he’s Herman Blume. He’s been in blockbuster comedies and he’s been in critically adored indie flicks. He’s openly mocked the crap that he’s done in hilarious fasion, i.e. “Zombieland”.

In this GQ interview, he goes a bit further. He opens up and fires away at several people. He rips the writers of “Year One”. He can’t remember Jennifer Love-Hewitt’s name. He crushes the sickening Los Angeles lifestyle. He sings the praises of “Kung Fu Hustle”.

However, he saves the biggest shots for “Garfield”. Guess the “Zombieland” joke wasn’t enough?

And my agents called on Monday and said, “Well, they came back with another offer, and it was nowhere near $50,000.” And I said, “That’s more befitting of the work I expect to do!” So they went off and shot the movie, and I forgot all about it. Finally, I went out to L.A. to record my lines. And usually when you’re looping a movie, if it takes two days, that’s a lot. I don’t know if I should even tell this story, because it’s kind of mean. [beat] What the hell? It’s interesting. So I worked all day and kept going, “That’s the line? Well, I can’t say that.” And you sit there and go, What can I say that will make this funny? And make it make sense? And I worked. I was exhausted, soaked with sweat, and the lines got worse and worse. And I said, “Okay, you better show me the whole rest of the movie, so we can see what we’re dealing with.” So I sat down and watched the whole thing, and I kept saying, “Who the hell cut this thing? Whodid this? What the f*** was Coen thinking?” And then they explained it to me: It wasn’t written by that Joel Coen.

Well, that Joel Cohen is kind of a hack. Can’t believe I’m gonna say this but…I think Bill Murray is making this up. Is there any possible way he would think that the Coen Brothers would direct a freaking Garfield movie? He would have to be off his rocker to think that is in the realm of reality.

“Inception”? It Really Means Film Perfection Achieved

As I watched the “Inception” credits roll by, my first thought was that Christopher Nolan is a certified filmmaking genius. In a time where people are wowed by cartoon movies (yeah, I’m looking at you “Avatar”), Nolan has created a movie that is so meticulously crafted and sculpted, with such a dense, layered script, that’s it hard to even believe that Warner Brothers put up the cash for this unbelievably daring movie. There have been large scale films that have crashed and burned because they are bad movies. I have a feeling this movie could crash and burn (a little bit) because it is far too good.

By now, you’ve probably read a bit about this movie so you have some idea that it focuses on dreams. You’ve probably also read that it’s very difficult to talk about this movie without spilling the beans on the twists and turns that occur. Just know this: do not believe all the talk about “Inception” being too confusing or hard to follow. It’s simply not true. Yes, you have to pay attention to every single word that is said, as every single word is used to advance the story. There is not one throwaway line, no filler. It’s meaty. It’s wordy.

Again, I don’t want to scare the casual movie goer away. Sure, if you aren’t interested in a complex story with several (and I mean several) layers in it, you may find yourself a bit bored. See, the first 45 minutes or so are really dedicated to learning about how Cobb (Leonardo DiCaprio) and his crew essentially break into people’s dreams in an effort to steal secrets. This is done while explaining to his new hire, Ariadne (Ellen Page, actually not annoying), as they walk around in a dream. It’s one of the more visually amazing sequences you will see…until about an hour later.

Cobb is hired by Saito (Ken Watanabe) to break into Robert Fischer’s mind (Cillian Murphy) and…well, I don’t want to say. Let’s just say that it’s an elaborate heist that lasts the last 45-60 minutes of the movie. It also involves dreaming within a dream…within a dream. Like I said, there are many layers to this onion.

During the heist, you are treated to some fantastic acting from DiCaprio, witty dialogue (mostly from Tom Hardy, who steals virtually every scene he’s in), and of course, the pinnacle achievement of “Inception”. That would be the hotel sequence which mostly features Arthur (the as cool as a cucumber Joseph Gordon-Levitt) in a spinning hallway, experiencing shifts in gravity, free fall, and eventually, zero gravity. It’s as breathtaking a scene that I’ve ever watched and, get ready, because it lasts about 20 minutes. It’s the kind of scene that is so amazing that will keep you coming back to this movie for years to come.

I’m lucky enough to have a rating system on Cinematically Correct that allows me to reference someone without actually saying his name. I’m not comparing “Inception” to this director’s movies at all. However, it lives and breathes in the same world as those movies. It’s completely original, it doesn’t use CGI, it uses action to advance the story. It’s just a phenomenal achievement for Christopher Nolan and really has to be seen to fully understand its greatness. Many people have written about it and tried to expound on it, but it really is impossible to do so.

There is no doubt in my mind that “Inception” will walk away with the most Academy Awards this year. It’s a shoo-in for Best Editing, Best Sound, Best Cinematography, essentially every technical award is in the bag for it. I’m sure Best Picture and Best Director nominations are coming its way as well. After scanning movies to be released this year, there really can’t be anything to compare to the job Christopher Nolan has done. For his work to not be recognized this time around, well, it would be a travesty.

In short, my feeling is that “Inception” makes “Avatar” its bitch. It’s perfection. It’s a pulp sci-fi thriller masterpiece. The guy seen here with the cig in his mouth would’ve been proud.

My Expectations For “Inception” Are So High That I’ll Probably Hate It

There’s no going back now. Tickets are purchased. “Inception” is a go. There’s a good chance I would have gone at midnight last night, but Wednesday night’s late illness and the subsequent sick day yesterday waved bye-bye to those plans. So, I must be patient, get through the workday, dinner, all the while mentally preparing for this movie like I was studying for the SATs.

So, think I’ve built this up too much? You have no idea. I gleefully giggle when I see commercials for it. I’ve avoided the glowing reviews in an effort to have exactly no idea of what I’m going to see. I’m looking forward to this more than I was “The Dark Knight”, which I went to see while on vacation at the beach. Yes. I went to see a movie while on vacation. At a beach.

My giddiness over “Inception” isn’t really due to the story or the insane looking stuff going on in it. There are three reasons why I’ve been all over this movie from the moment rumors about it popped up.

1. Christopher Nolan. Seriously, think hard. When have his movies let you down? “Insomnia”? Come on. Nolan’s the only guy to get Al Pacino to not scream and whoo-haaa his way through a movie in years. Even “The Prestige” is killer. It’s totally played out to say this, but Nolan is Stanley Kubrick all over again. He’s cerebral, visionary, and a master behind the camera.
2. Joseph Gordon-Levitt. I used to tape “Third Rock From The Sun”, just because of him. Kidding. That show sucked. However, JGL (that’s what douchebag fanboys like me call him) is about to hit the big time. He already took a check and hid himself behind ridiculous makeup in “GI Joe” but up until then, nothing but tiny indie movies that he was fantastic in. He’ll never be the classic leading man like…
3. Leonardo DiCaprio. Think about this. Leo could have gone straight to romantic leading man status after “Titanic”. Thankfully, he decided to be awesome instead. Just because he’s pretty does mean he isn’t completely badass. He’s the best, the best only want to work with him, and he hasn’t severely disappointed (sorta disappointed me in “Shutter Island”)  in years. You can count on him to be light’s out fantastic every time out of the box. He’s the Roy Halladay of movies.

Sorry about the Phillies reference there. Had to be done.

So, how much cash will this make this weekend? I’m guessing around $60 to 70 million. I judge this based on listening to the people with whom I work. Of the six people that I hear or talk to on a daily basis, not a one of them has a clue about this movie. Someone I know actually had not even heard of it until it started trending on Twitter this week. It’s just not a mainstream type movie due to the mystery and oddity of the entire thing.

All I need to tell myself is that if I don’t really know what I’m going to see tonight, there is no way an average movie fan has any clue whatsoever. I don’t want to get all movie snob up in here, but most people want to see crap like “The A Team” or “Grown Ups”. I get that movies are escapism and people just want to turn their brains off for two hours, honestly, I get that. But, don’t they want to be challenged at all? Don’t you want to see something that makes you think? That encourages thought? When the returns come in on Sunday, we’ll find out.

Go Ahead & Put The “Toy Story” Trilogy In The Best Ever Category

Why do you make me cry? Damn you Pixar!!

Think about this: “Cars” is widely regarded as Pixar’s poorest effort. Pixar’s bar is so high that a fine movie like “Cars” is a weak effort. It would probably be Dreamworks animation’s best movie. That is how off the charts fantastic Pixar is. They are the Apple of animated films.

As expected, “Toy Story 3″ continues the streak of greatness. While “Finding Nemo” is still my favorite Pixar flick, the first “Toy Story” is a close second. This latest flick does nothing to disappoint the “Toy Story” franchise, if anything, it is the finest of the three movies.

This time around, Woody and Buzz (the brilliant Tom Hanks & Tim Allen) are dealing with the fact that their owner, Andy, is off to college. For fear of being thrown away, Woody, Buzz, Jessie (Joan Cusack), Mr. & Mrs. Potato Head (Don Rickles & Estelle Harris), Rex (Wallace Shawn), those weird alien dolls, Slinky Dog (Blake Clark, filling in for the deceased Jim Varney), and my personal favorite, Hamm (voiced by the brilliant John Ratzenberger), all decide to hide in a box of toys headed to a day care center.

Day care sounds like a match made in heaven for retired toys right? Well, not when the toys are being run by Lotso (Ned Beatty), a big stuffed bear with a downright evil agenda. At his side is the doll Ken (hilariously voiced by Michael Keaton) and a gang of toys that force Andy’s toys to be used and abused by preschoolers. To be honest, the initial shock of seeing Buzz and the others be abused by the kids is a bit scary.

So Woody escapes, he goes back, funny things happen, you get the idea. This movie isn’t about a story so much as it the message and the characters. There are a few moments that are actually very harrowing and scary for Woody and the gang. At one point, I was nervous for them so I can’t imagine what an eight year old kid was thinking. Yikes.

Most of all, I was sobbing. Yes, full on sobbing for the last 20 minutes or so of the movie. I challenge any adult who owned a toy to fight through the ending because if you make it through without tears, you may have no soul. “Toy Story 3″ makes you feel good about letting go of your childhood. It’s a 90-plus minute love letter to being a kid.

Up until now, “Toy Story 3″ is my favorite movie of 2010. It’s just a fun ride with a huge heart that it wears on its sleeve. It’s impossible to dislike any of the characters, thanks to the amazing character development…of toys. It’s just another mark of excellence from Pixar, who really have yet to fail.