Home > Cinematically Correct, Movie Reviews, Movies, My Movie Reviews > Who Else Wants To Be Refunded For “Couples Retreat”?

Who Else Wants To Be Refunded For “Couples Retreat”?

I require in-depth, personal therapy after seeing this movie.

I require in-depth, personal therapy after seeing this movie.

Many film critics go into great detail to explain why they did or didn’t like a movie. They’ll spend hours upon hours thinking about the best way to describe the movie. They may even consult a thesaurus. After seeing “Couples Retreat”, I can tell you that I did not like this movie. Instead of wasting more life on this movie than I already have, I’m not going to rack my brain with thought concerning it. To put it quite simply, “Couples Retreat” is so insultingly bad that even the general public is going to reject this one to half court.

It’s hard to believe that Vince Vaughn and Jon Favreau, the two guys behind “Swingers” and “Made”, are responsible for writing this garbage. Not only that, they brought in their producing buddy Peter Billingsley (Ralphie in “A Christmas Story”) to begin and hopefully end his directorial career. I wonder if Favreau, who directed much, much better movies like “Iron Man” and “Elf”, read their finished script and said, “there is no way I’m lowering my directing fees by directing this trash”.

Is there any doubt this entire movie was an excuse to get all of these real life buddies to Bora Bora at some sweet resort? I sure hope it is because the reason in getting them there is actually dumber. One couple (Jason Bateman and Kristen Bell) are pondering divorce and they want to go to this resort that specializes in healing married couples. They can’t afford to go it alone, but they can afford the group rate so they invite their friends…and those friends say yes to this insanity. I will actually believe that a guy can build a metal suit that can make him fly before I believe this preposterous decision.

Other than his tiny role in “Into The Wild”, Vince Vaughn has really hit the skids with garbage like “Four Christmases” and “Fred Claus”. Sadly, these movies keep earning enough cash to allow him to continually make these brain dead movies. It’s really a shame because Vaughn was on such a roll with “Old School”, “Anchorman”, and especially “Wedding Crashers”. He’s definitely a talented and funny actor, which gives me hope that he can get back to movies like those ones.

The SpamThere’s really no way for me to sugar coat how amazingly unfunny and in poor taste this movie is. It’s bookkended with a kid pissing the bed and then crapping in a toilet on a store’s product floor. There are so many instances of product placement that are so obvious, they may actually work. An entire sequence is dedicated to watching Vince Vaughn play Guitar F***ing Hero. That alone makes this movie so repulsive to me, that I would actually like for my wife and I’s money back.

  1. October 12, 2009 at 4:12 PM

    It’s really tough to suggest which movie is bad or good. Every body has his personal choice. Some may of may not like it, You can’t totally judge what the critics have to say. Do you?

    • October 12, 2009 at 4:23 PM

      I’m guessing there is some sort of language barrier with this one…right?

  2. mcarteratthemovies
    October 13, 2009 at 3:12 PM

    I’m pretty sure that Marc over at http://greatct.wordpress.com/ would second your consternation. Any movie that gives Vince Vaugh enough time to play “Guitar Hero” probably ain’t exactly “Citizen Kane.” But I am a little disappointed, if only because I always have high hopes for Jason Bateman.

  3. October 14, 2009 at 5:52 AM

    Couples Retreat is such a nice movie.

  4. Ashley
    November 9, 2009 at 10:28 AM

    Oh my god. You’re just so very miserable I realise when I read this and if you think that everyone is so annoying writing like 5000 words abou a movie I ask, then why are you doing it. You seem very desperate lol oh my god, this movie doesn’t suck or maybe you just don’t understand :O ! Shit, learn would you?

    • November 9, 2009 at 10:36 AM

      Yes Ashley, I was very miserable while I watched “Couples Retreat”. After reading my post, you have proved to be very observant. It’s uncanny.

      Also, you are probably right about me not understanding this complex film. I missed the subtleties involved in seeing a man jam his crotch in another man’s face while wearing a Speedo.

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