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Can’t Believe It…But That Episode Of “Lost” Completely & Totally Sucked

Normally, I wait a day or two to let each episode of “Lost” roll around in my head before I sit down to write about it. Not so this time. I am so infuriated and dissatisfied that I feel personally slighted. There have been boring episodes, there have been episodes that felt like they were just killing time. Counting tonight, there were only two episodes remaining before the series finale. In my opinion, this episode was a complete and total waste of time in which we learned absolutely next to nothing.

Believe me, I’m quite bitter. All I kept reading about was “wait until you see the episode about the Island” or “it’s going to blow your mind learning about Jacob”. That makes this complete failure of an episode an even more bitter pill to swallow. Don’t sell me the Cadillac and then give me an Aveo.

Seriously, what did we learn from “Across The Sea”. Jacob and the Man In Black are twins. Yeah, I kind of picked that up a long time ago. Okay, their real mom was killed by the woman that raised them. Yes, that brings up several parallels with Kate and Claire, Ben and Danielle Rousseau, etc. But…why did Allison Janney kill Claudia? Because she would take them back to the people who are bad? Why are they bad? Who are they? Also, where the hell did Allison Janney come from? I’m getting a little sick and tired of more questions with zero answers.

How did their mom make it so Jacob and the Man In Black can’t harm each other? Did she do some kind of snake dance and make it happen? Again, I’m tired of not knowing and it flat out pisses me off that, in an episode that everyone said would spell things out, did nothing of the sort.

Am I done ranting and raving? Nope. Next up, let’s talk about this cave and the light. Yes, let’s discuss. Umm…well…it’s a light. It’s the power of the Island. It’s life. It’s death. But yeah, mostly just a big light. Oh, you so do not want to go into the light because it’s worse than death. Okay, super. Why? How? Does it have a purpose? I guess it just makes people travel through time all willy nilly and we shouldn’t really worry about it.

So the Man In Black (don’t even get me started on the fact that he has no name) goes and lives with the bad people. Okay, I’ll go along with the idea that they are bad and corrupted by human nature. Whatever. So they dig a hole that will eventually become where the wagon wheel goes. Sweet! So we did find something out…oh, wait, did we? Not really. We learned that the Man In Black put the wheel there because he knew how to rig up the wheel along with some irrigation system that would get him off the Island. Cool…how do you know how to do that Man In Black? Oh, you’re special you say. Well la-de-freaking-da your special.

Jacob tells Allison Janney that the Man In Black found a way off the Island. So she goes and trashes their little archeological dig to keep him from splitting. She also kills all the so-called bad people. Well, this sets the Man In Black off and he kills Allison Janney. Jacob shows up and beats the crap out of the Man In Black and drags him to the mysterious special light. He chucks him in there and he gets sucked down some kind of sinkhole and then out flies Smokey. Awesome! We found out how the Man In Black became Smokey! Right? Didn’t we? No, we freaking didn’t. There is absolutely zero explanation of any of this because we unfortunately still have no idea what the hell is really happening.

The best part of this episode was we finally found out who the skeletons were in the Losties cave from way back in season one. Is it poignant or meaningful? A little, but not much. Yes, Jacob has some guilt over killing his brother and the murder of his mother, but it has little to do with the Losties, the Island, the overall story, and, most of the all, the Island’s mythology.

Do I sound too pissed off or maybe misguided in my anger? I don’t think so. I am beyond pissed that all this mythology about Jacob is based on absolutely nothing. So, Jacob and the Man In Black can’t kill each other because Allison Janney made it so? The light is the life of the Island? The Man In Black is special? How did the light make the Man In Black become Smokey? These are all huge questions regarding the mythology of “Lost” and if this is their explanation of these types of things, it’s a disappointment of epic proportions.

I don’t need everything spelled out for me. I understand that some mysteries will never be solved, but one or two wouldn’t be a bad idea to just tell us. There is no reason for any of this. Want more questions with no answers? How is Jacob immortal? I guess Allison Janney decided that he would be that way too. Basically, all I can take away from this pathetic episode is that Allison Janney is behind all the mysteries of “Lost”. I wouldn’t mind having a better answer than that and if that really is their explanation, it’s a serious let down for something that I have been looking forward to for over six years.

I’m really hoping that the next two weeks make me forget what I just watched.


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