Home > Celebrity News, Cinematically Correct, Lists!, Movie News, Movies > When Orlando Bloom News Happens, Rest Assured, You’ll Find Me Commenting On His Hair Here

When Orlando Bloom News Happens, Rest Assured, You’ll Find Me Commenting On His Hair Here

Get in more movies dude.

Here is the current Cinematically Correct Man Crush Top Five:

5. Chase Utley: Will always be permanent fixture here.

4. Orlando Bloom: His hair keeps him on the list.

3. Mike Richards: His shorthanded goal last night alone puts him on the list with a bullet.

2. Robert Downey Jr.: Keep in mind, he pisses excellence.

1. Ryan Adams: It would take quite a bit to remove him from the top spot.

Sure, there are some news items to report about a few of the guys on my list here, most notably, Ryan’s upcoming release of his first metal album titled “Orion”. I could go on and on about that, no doubt boring several of you. Instead, let’s go a different route and bore you with Orlando Bloom talk instead.

Bloom has signed onto the latest rehashing of “Three Musketeers”. Which one is he playing you ask? Well slow your roll pal, Orlando Bloom is going to play the main villain in the flick. Let me just guarantee you this right now: He will knock this role out of the mutherf’ing park. The character is described as “so cool that you can chop him into cubes and serve with vodka”. To me, that sounds like a smooth-talking, slick, disgustingly obnoxious evil guy and I think this is the perfect part for him. He was just weaselly enough in “Troy”, but here, I’m betting he goes all out on the scumbagginess.

But for now, let’s just admire his hair.

  1. mcarteratthemovies
    May 27, 2010 at 10:20 AM

    The only man whose hair bewitches me more is David Lynch. For real. If I read an interview with the guy and there’s a picture, forget it. All I’m gonna do is stare at his hair.

    Since you have your man crushes, here are my girl crushes (tit for tit, see):

    4) Milla Jovovich (I LOVE to watch this woman fight)
    3) Vera Farmiga (her voice is better than Spanish fly)
    2) Kate Winslet (she had me at “I apply my personality in a paste”)
    1) Maggie Gyllenhaal

    • May 27, 2010 at 10:24 AM

      That is a formidable & genius list!

      I even stared at the cartoon hair of the character Gus that Lynch voices on “The Cleveland Show”. He does have amazing hair.

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