Trailer Talk! Harry Goes Big! Paranormal Activity 2 Is Even More Paranormally! Clooney Shockingly Looks Cool!
Today, I’m debuting a brand new segment here on the Cinematically Correct broadcast that will either happen all the time, sporadically, or never again. We’re gonna have some Trailer Talk. Of course, by “we” I mean that I will write about these three trailers then tens of people will breeze over it then go about the rest of their day. It’s going to be epic.
First up is this brand spanking new trailer for “Paranormal Activity 2”. Is there any doubt this movie is going to suck? The first one is total bulsh. I spend 80 minutes watching two annoying California douchebags lay in bed, jump at strange noises, then get about two minutes of actual creepy stuff? Forget that noise. If you haven’t seen it, save your time and watch this trailer because it’s one minute and thirteen second runtime contains as many scares as the first film.
Ohhhh!! Shivers!! I’m so scared after watching that. Really. Mortified.
Let’s move on to something with a bit more substance and watch George Clooney be a hit man in “The American”. Clooney really goes for broke with this role as he romps around Europe in cool clothes, driving cool cars, saying cool things, and bedding hot chicks. A real stretch for the guy. In all seriousness, I am looking forward to this movie, mostly because I like movies about snipers in Europe. I mean, remember “Gotcha!” with Goose before he was Goose but after he was Gilbert. That movie rules. That’s right…“Gotcha!” rules. Soooo, watch this trailer for “The American” and admire my slick transitional writing skills.
Does it make Clooney sick to look in the mirror and see how handsome he is and to know that people are disfigured? Don’t you think he should think that?
The final trailer today is for “Harry Potter & The Deathly Hallows”. There will be no mockery here…unless you feel the need to mock me, a 33-year old man-child that gets weepy over watching adolescent wizards use their little wooden sticks in an epic battle of good versus evil. No, there will be no mockery.